Elmo Erect

Cuddly Muppet confused by inaugural boner

Sep 23rd, 2010 | By Coco Cabrera | Category: Arts

Sesame Street’s contention that it will not air a video segment featuring pop sensation Katy Perry because her dress was “too risqué” is, in fact, a cover story says a source.

cropped photo

“The truth is, Elmo got chubbo,” the source said. “Ms. Perry was just doing what she does, and she is a very attractive woman.  Elmo is getting older and I guess he experienced more mature feelings.”

A camera man on the shoot confirmed the account. “That red fur isn’t that deep so … it became apparent very quickly.  Hey, I am completely with Elmo. When she came on set in that gold bustier, I got wood.”

Elmo was said to be confused by the vascular manifestation of his sudden and profoundly shallow feeling for Ms. Perry.  Elmo’s agent, Mike Vargas, issued an apology for his client’s conduct.  “His invitation to ‘tickle me’ was in earnest and not an invitation to sexual touching”.

In 1999,  a fellow Sesame Street cast member, Aloysius Snuffleupagus, was charged with felony indecent exposure for an event during the Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade. Those charges were eventually withdrawn.

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