Advertisers Ditch CBC

Urging Canadians to become more active ratings killer

Jan 11th, 2011 | By Coco Cabrera | Category: Featured

Advertisers are no longer placing commercials on CBC television as Toronto’s national broadcaster mounts a campaign for people to watch it less.

CBC Television’s Winter season slogan “Live Right Now” is an entreaty for Canadians to adopt healthier lifestyles, a program that would entail becoming more active and so watching less television.  Healthy changes to diet would mean citizens ceasing to consume many of the food and beverage products advertised on the service.

Peter Mansbridge

“They’ve basically told their advertisers to go fuck themselves,” says media analyst Susan Vertoise. “That’s probably fair comment but it is also suicidal in the television racket.”

Automobile manufacturers are also said to be incensed by the CBC’s open advocacy of walking. “The CBC has always had a tendency to tell us what we should like,” said Vertoise, “but now they are telling their audience how to behave.  It’s ratings poison.”

A cornerstone of the CBC’s “Live Right Now” agenda is the reality show “Village on a Diet” wherein the XXL land mammals of a British Columbia backwater are collectively pressured to shed a full ton of arse lard.  Last week an anonymous source claimed that competitor CTV was sabotaging the show by handing out free large format bottles of pop and gift coupons redeemable at fast food outlets to villagers.  No proof of the allegation was found.

Television industry analysts feel that CBC is also coming to the reality/exploitation genre too late. “Using these poor fatsos for fodder is so 2008,” said Hildy Kitt of Thrush Media.

Friends of Canadian Broadcasting believe the damage to Toronto’s National Broadcaster will be modest. “With so few people watching it the capacity of the CBC to hurt itself is limited,” said a spokesperson.

The move away from the enjoyment of fatty and sugary foods while remaining inactive in front of a mindless television program comes after the unceremonious sacking of CBC Head in Chief Dick Stursburger.   Stursburger was a powerful advocate for the famed purveyor of sugar-coated fried dough, Tim Hortons.

In an unrelated development, children’s entertainers Casey and Finnegan, once a popular comic duo on the program ” Mr. Dressup”, have been named joint Heads in Chief of CBC’s English Service.  After an exhaustive executive search failed to find a replacement for Stursburger the President and Board of Directors decided to leave the custodial team in place.

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