Planetary Insolvency

Cumulative debt of earth exceeds its ability to pay

Jan 28th, 2011 | By Coco Cabrera | Category: Featured

Planet Earth

With one seemingly ordinary credit card purchase of a pair of corduroy trousers, a belt and three pairs of socks at an Eddie Bauer store in Etobicoke, Ontario, the world crossed into bankruptcy.

“There is now more debt in the world than there will ever be money to pay it back,” said economist Howard Earles of the University of Newfoundland at St. John's. “Even if everyone on the planet ceased buying, the amount outstanding will always grow faster than the amount available to pay it back. The world should just push the keys through the mail slot and walk

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away from the planet.”

Because of the world going bust the messages being sent into deep space by the SETI project have been altered to pleas to undiscovered worlds and unknown forms of intelligence for a bailout.

“Frankly,” said Earles, “I would have to advise those space aliens not to lend humanity an Alpha Centurian nickel.  Earth is irresponsible with money.”

The world's conduct last evening after news of the bankruptcy would seem to bear out Professor Earles' contention.  The world behaved as if nothing had happened, put a huge dinner on a tab and then used the company credit card to go on a bender with an expensive escort.

Stock markets across the universe have responded positively to the downturn in the earth's finances. Experts see it as an opportunity to buy up some blue real estate for development as holiday destinations from off-world sites.

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