Duceppe Asks Marois To Lie Down

Layton capitulation stymies blackmail

Feb 21st, 2011 | By Coco Cabrera | Category: Politics

BQ's Duceppe (g) and PQ's Marois (d) wrestle for Canuck bucks

Recognizing that Quebec’s independence is a greater possibility with the Parti Quebecois posed to win the next provincial election, Bloc Quebecois leader Gilles Duceppe has issued an impassioned plea to PQ leader Pauline Marois to throw the contest.

Duceppe’s future came into sharp focus Friday when NDP leader Jack Layton unconditionally surrendered to Steve Harper.  Duceppe was attempting to blackmail Harper, making outlandish demands in return for Bloc Quebecois votes.  The NDP’s indication it might not vote down a budget featuring tax breaks for Canada’s richest corporations means the support of the Bloc is no longer necessary. The haunting sound of the Prime Minister’s gleeful cackling was heard echoing throughout the Parliament buildings over the weekend.

How Ms Marois would engineer defeat for her party is not specified in the unauthenticated communique.  The  document points out that the Bloc Quebecois would have “difficulty making a case in English Canada” for its continued presence in the “Occupation Parliament” once all the seats it now holds were in another country.  Duceppe noted that while Canadians  have so far been docile and compliant in letting an avowed separatist party live off their taxes, the transfer of their money to another sovereign body, the new nation of Quebec (or Parti Marois Québec Déchirée en Provenance du Canada) would cause questions to be asked.

It is known the Parti Quebecois disagrees with this contention, believing Canada will continue to underwrite Quebec even after it leaves confederation.  Such an arrangement does not help Duceppe, whose sinecure is in Canada.

Leaked top-secret BQ memoranda have posited that Duceppe position himself as the defender of other groups vying for attention from Canada’s Government. Suggestions have included changing the focus of the leader and the party to the: Bloc Gais, Lesbiennes et Transgenres; Bloc Cement Lafarge; Bloc Parti; Bloc Lego; Bloc MADD; and Bloc Star Trek Weekend.

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