RBC to sponsor Canada

Natural fit

Feb 16th, 2011 | By Carl Johnson | Category: News

Canada's new logo

Not to be outdone by “Scotiabank’s Hockey Day In Canada,” RBC has announced a deal to be the exclusive sponsor of the country itself.  Under the terms of the agreement, already approved by the Conservative-controlled Senate, Canada will be known as the Royal Bank of Canada’s Canada, or RBCC.  The executive branch will henceforth be known as the RBC-PMO, while the Bank of Canada will become the Royal Bank of Canada Bank of Canada or RBCBC.  Senior officials in the Ministry of Finance have already begun referring to the ministry as “the 53rd Floor”.

Following the 1992 introduction of the Canada logo under the Chretien dictatorship, a number of corporations began exploring the option of a hostile take-over of the near-bankrupt federal government.  The move was averted when Canada’s then Chief Financial Officer, Paul Martin Jr. was able to re-capitalize by selling off provinces and municipalities.  Most financial analysts have felt that it was simply a matter of time before formal stakes were offered, especially under a Conservative government eager for penetration by big business.

What really had RBC executives rubbing their hands together was the knowledge that this time next year every media outlet in the country will dutifully refer to Hockey Day in Canada as “Scotiabank’s Hockey Day in the Royal Bank of Canada’s Canada”.  Word on Bay Street is that the occasion will be used to formally announce the union of the two banks, since RBC and Scotia have long been sitting on an illegal secret merger agreement that will now go forward as part of the Royal Bank of Canada’s Canada’s sponsorship deal with its parent, RBC.

-with files by Coco Cabrera

Share this!